siénteme, no esperes hasta el
entonces ¿seguro que llegará?
más seguro no lo tienes más cer-
ca, sendero hacia mí un paso ...
mirada tan inquieta que se soba
su fiel brazo – lo único que le
ha sido tan [fiel], constante, siempre
a su lado ... recordarte no ha sido
[mil] cien y ? me ha costado [cien] mil, o sea
las cositas que según dividen en
clases, una diferencia de poder
adquirir a cambio de más o
menos renta, ¿cuánto cuesta mi
deseo por más cosas? ¿cuánto me
pagas por ese lujo? ... la palma de
mi mano tapaba una cicatriz
sobre mis ojos, es que no olvidaba
aquel rumor con que aguantaba
tu mirada cuando tú sólo bus-
cabas entender.
(Originally posted on Tuesday, June 17, 2003.)
en esta ocasión me ha tocado mi
mi eslabón de crueldad, re-
flexión y remordimiento veamos
la verdad: [es que sentir] [cruel]
hacer cualquier barbaridad nace
de [cualquier germen] serenidad [de] aburrimien
to simple esquema, bate la
yema, ya verás en qué sentido
suele dar [el] es un sistema con gran pro-
blema de desbaratarse cada
vez de par en par. mientras vigi-
laba el moro con baba el joven
de Francia tan maco, bajó del tren
qué horror que me daba cuando encon-
traba que el [buen] francés se
llevó mi cartera con él.
=yo cuando cojo no suelto=
(por áhi en 1998 ¡!)
(Posted on Tuesday, June 17, 2003.)
a waist of thyme and other singular sensations
couldn't release me from this monumentous
caucasian and other likewise conjurations.
In a weak chime or not even surrounded, rows
of teeth, taught eyes and lips, circumvented
glances, a proximity knot with/standing
preconceptions, the dizziness of affection
that creates this string, scratching a cheat
and feinting a loss of breath, creeps up in
a treaty, recalling with some thing, a kin,
those that daze when there was a bit a little
shame that inevitably prevented all in-
cluding your own lethal crimes incar-
nate. Did you even think it before you
didn't do it? a muddle of expectations
but that's just because not even deeply
do I hint at not acknowledging how it rests
uncomfortably reasons me within the
care of my own vital organs' cage. or to
say: what is it that equalizes our condition?
or is it just that: negating[e] this and thus
that: a disregard for a quite simple connection
between our slight but and different conditions, am
I getting close? not likely
(Originally posted on Monday, May 12, 2003?)
un lapso = conténlo en estos pocos días
ya no acostumbro mirarme tan detenida-
mente en las superficies reflejantes. pre-
fiero el paso veloz, voltear la cabeza
y captar el juego fugaz de luz. quisiera
x
(Originally posted on Wednesday, April 16, 2003?)
used to live, once, on expectation and memories
the fulfillment of one was the trap of the other
ensconced is the term that most comes into mind
and now, like most, I waste a whole lot of effort
not seeing or being with anyone else, distracted
and ignoring what I know: I seek out what I want,
that which most resembles me. call it comfort.
get lost in the tumble, rub the bull out of your eyes
it's useless to insist on sensible admonitions.
is it so early yet that your hand becomes a feature
of on your face? a solemn expedition to retrace
all the impacts upon you until the next stop
x
If I were in the place I was meant most to be
would the people be similar, as they are
and not as they seem? would I still be so?
would I still be me? I know we tend to huddle,
and there hope that there is truly some
affinity, but the arms that are willing to
hold you are just as able to elbow out all
who least fit into that cherished profile -
the repetition of me, we, us. losing, lost.
x
I think I'm better off rattling off absurdities
I tend to linger more, wallow, all the gunk that
follows. respectable fellows! groomed as we are
to resist in our minds the oppressive cognition
of ourselves as rows of fed cannisters = rejoice!
(Originally posted on Wednesday, April 16, 2003?)
empieza de una vez: no es un alarido
y no te des por, sino acéptate como
tal. “Qué escaño; es que nunca íbamos a
venir,” concluye. Si te forras con muros de piedra ...
empieza otra vez = entonces, como si en
una pecera vivieras. La imagen era la
de hombres calvos abarrotando una
peluquería ...
demasiadas interrupciones = se ...
(y ni un momento de tranquilidad = pues, no
la busco.)
todo olía a aceite – de repente – parecía que
nos queríamos quemar vivos, todos, juntos
pero sólo por el hecho de estar uno al lado
de la otra, no porque nos sentíamos y menos
porque nos asemejábamos. todo está borroso =
demasiados años en frente de la luz,
quemándome los ojos, esta película gris.
aquellos viejos cuentos de cómo la gente
sospecha de lo que no conoce siguen siendo
ciertos, y lo usan para que sigamos cayendo
aunque conozcamos el engaño al final no nos
es extraño, “baja del peldaño, tú, técnico de
antaño” se me ha hecho tacaño este trozo de papel
«tardé una semana»
2002-12-29 –> 2003-01-05
(Originally posted on Wednesday, April 16, 2003?)
[Greetings! This space will serve as a repository for some writings (in English and/or Spanish) which appeared in a soon to be eliminated “weblog” called “RuBtHeBuLlOuT”. After which one hopes to continue depositing more texts/words here, as there, before. Thanks for reading!]